Action / Adventure


Uploaded By: Bokutox
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October 22, 2012 at 1:13 pm



Jon Voight as Paul Serone
Jennifer Lopez as Terri Flores
Eric Stoltz as Dr. Steven Cale
Ice Cube as Danny Rich
720p 1080p
649.88 MB
23.976 fps
1hr 29 min
P/S 9 / 16
1.20 GB
23.976 fps
1hr 29 min
P/S 11 / 57

Movie Reviews

Reviewed by likeitorloatheit 5 / 10

Little consistency

This is not as bad as some people say it is. Generally, it's pretty formulaic, but there are a few alterations on the monster movie format.

A crew making a documentary set sail down a tropical river, on their way losing their fuel and, you guessed it, bumping into a big snake. There are all the usual characters here: beautiful girl, villain, posh English bloke (there's always one!), working-class hero, etc. They gradually get picked off one-by-one - although guessing the next "victim" is so easy, it takes the fun out of it all.

There are a few oddities in the consistency of the plot. Most of the killing happen in the second half of the film with the first half devoted to boring sub-plots. Curiously, the customary "introduction shock" is not a snake death, but a suicide. We never really find out why this has happened - after all, there is still a lot of Jennifer Lopez to be shown - and this, I
think, is one of the main problems with the film. Story lines are attempted but never completed and so the audience will never gain true satisfaction from the film.

Another interesting factor is Terri's boyfriend and his contribution to the story line. During a dive, he gets bitten and the crew manage to recover him. They save his life but he is still unconscious and remains so throughout most of the movie.

However, the weakest character of all is the snake. Sure, it's pretty ugly, but it will never be truly terrifying as the director doesn't play on our sense of fear. We may be surprised when the snake attacks but never truly shocked.

As I said before, this isn't too bad a movie (I've seen worse) - there are some moments of tension, the actors do their jobs and the special effects are far from laughable. You might want to watch this if it's shown of TV, but I wouldn't pay money to see it.

Reviewed by squill ( 10 / 10

Brilliant Saturday Matinee Classic

Growing up in the 50's gave me the privilege of being one the last generations of filmgoers to enjoy the Saturday afternoon double-feature matinee experience at the neighborhood theatre. These double-features were primarily low budget sci-fi/horror epics with slender threads of plot, lovely damsels in distress (Beverly Garland, Barbara Rush), square-jawed heroes (Peter Graves, Richard Carlson) and budget monsters from Mars, the grave, melted icebergs, mad scientist's labs or atomic fallout. Well not really. The monsters were usually guys in rubber suits (Creature From The Black Lagoon, This Island Earth), or cheap trick photography (Tarantula, Attack of the 50 Ft Woman), or `Mask and Glove' illusions (I Was A Teenage Werewolf/Frankenstein, Monster On The Campus), or, if we were really lucky, a Ray Harryhausen stop motion creation.

Needless to say this wasn't great cinema, but what it WAS, was great fun. Were you scared? Not really. Did you have the need for everything to be fact-based and believable? Of course not! You went to be entertained, to let your imagination merge with the sounds and images and have a good time, laughing or screaming. Could anyone really take the monster from `It Conquered The World' seriously, or wonder whether `The Creature From The Black Lagoon' was biologically possible or if it could anatomically deflower Julie Adams? Didn't matter. Instead, you let yourself meld into the film's world and travel along for the ride.

Thus whether you were on the obviously and badly animated `Angry Red Planet', or trapped with James Best on the island of dogs in make-up which were trying to pass for `The Killer Shrews', you surrendered to the magic.

My heart weeps for the post `Star Wars' filmgoers, these people weaned on special effects, the MTVers and video viewers who've had their imaginations and attention spans kidnapped and are told what to see and how to interpret it. I truly am sorry. You people missed a modern day, Grade B double feature, sci-fi/horror classic called `Anaconda'. And we hadn't seen one this good since `Alien'.

Being an intelligent man, I realize the futility of convincing the non-believers who can't draw from the needed background reservoir to understand, so I won't bother preaching this film's virtues or try to win you over by fact and argument. This, however, is what I will say………

This is a brilliant re-creation of the lost art of the 1950's double-feature horror genre; not really a homage to, more the real thing. It's `Creature From The Black Lagoon', with a really cheesy computer animated snake in place of a guy in a really cheesy rubber suit. It's a Saturday afternoon classic for people who remember and understand them. Story is great, script is great, cinematography is great, direction is great, acting is great, the women beautiful and endangered, the heroes machismo and handsome, the monster phantasmagorical, and we get a bonus surprise by one of the greatest American actors, Jon Voight, doing a magnificent over-the-top, slimy, nasty, reprehensibly heartless villain, complete with a sly wink to the audience. His performance is the key to the film. He understood the film's intent and translated it to the screen for you. If it's in your realm of understanding and experience, you get it and are able to partake in this little slice of cinema heaven.

In 20 years, they'll be calling this a classic. I'm calling it one now.

Reviewed by Chrysanthepop 5 / 10

An Oscar Worthy Performance By Suzie

Llosa's 'Anaconda' is one of the most artistically crafted films of recent times (NOT!). The story is beautifully subtle. Basically, it's about a group of filmmakers or whatever trying to make a film in the fake rainforest but they encounter an unexpected visitor who takes them towards danger (how shocking!). Of course it's nice to see a snake movie that's carried by a heroine and a villainess (played by a snake). Moreover it's the voluptuous Jennifer Lopez! It's obvious that she's very happy to play the heroine and very excited to battle a snake. The 'hero' played by Eric Stoltz, spends most of his screen time sleeping. He only takes a momentary break from his REM sleep when the heroine is in trouble for one minute, otherwise she can handle herself. Ice Cube plays the cool black guy which seems to be a necessary ingredient in such movies. Of course he doesn't die because he's too cool. Thankfully Owen Wilson does not get decapitated like what happened in 'The Haunting'. Instead, he ends up getting gobbled up. Kari Wuhrer is the potential lonely hot chick who allows the camera to focus on her endowments (which, to one's disappointment, she doesn't fully show) and of course she's killed off. Then there's John Voight as typical greedy villain, the unexpected visitor. While all the actors give almost Oscar worthy performance, it is Suzie (I hope I got the name correct) the digital snake that steals the show. This actress (assuming that it's a female since she so lustfully gobbled up Owen Wilson and throws up John Voight because he's comparatively old and unattractive) gives one of the most nuanced performances. She downplays her part so well that one really has to look hard to find a registered expression on her face and the talented Suzie just gets it all right by hissing, slithering, showing off her tongue, throwing up and lustfully swallowing just on time. Lopez could have learned a thing or two about method acting and staying in character from her mega-talented co-star. It's sad that Suzie dies in the movie because I actually wanted her to win (sorry JLo). It's also a pity that Oscars don't award digital actresses because Suzie truly gave one of the finest performances. Shame on the Oscars for not noticing this gem! People should have spoken up for her. Anyway, to sum it up, 'Anaconda' is a cheeesy (unintentional comedic) horror/thriller wannabe. Yeah, it's a crappy movie.

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